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CONTEST: Action Movie Catch Phrases

Home - by - May 25, 2010 - 15:08 America/New_York - 160 Comments

UPDATE: Voting period starts now and ends tomorrow at noon (ish).

Okay. I was cruising the internet, not the gay kind of cruising (do ladyboys count?), and was over at IMAO to get a little laugh fix, and Frank J. had a nice post about Action Movie Catch Phrases.

When shooting someone in the face. “Now you’re dead… IN THE FACE!”

When killing someone after he said something that could be taken as innuendo. “That’s what she bled.”

“Time to bring on the pain… and I don’t mean the window kind! That’s pronounced the same but spelled differently that the pain I am talking about. So, to reiterate, the pain I am bringing is the P-A-I-N kind and has nothing to do with windows… unless I throw you through one. Then I guess pane would be causing you pain… or would you be touching the pane? I forget what part of the window is the pane; is that the glass or the frame? Whoa, what was I talking about again?”

“I have something in my pocket for your face… MY FIST!”

~snip~

So this is the mission. Create a POLITICAL ACTION MOVIE THRILLER CATCH PHRASE. Make Frank J. proud. Maybe he will come over and pick a winner. I’ll hound Lori and get her to ask him.

Submissions close at midnight. Then we will have overtime for a voting period that will run until noon tomorrow. Thumbed vote winner will get a guest blog spot to do whatever they heck they want. Same prize if Frank J. picks a winner.

Good luck.

» 160 Comments

  1. FaceFaceMan

    May 25th, 2010

    Can we only do one? I’ve got so many ideas. Blast! I will try to narrow it down.
    You can do 1000 – no limit – bfh

    Thumb up 0

     
  2. Uncle Al

    May 25th, 2010

    I’ve got your liberal education right here, punk.

    Thumb up +6

     
  3. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    Say hello to the Secretary of SLATE! (and then our hero smashes a Glenn Beck blackboard over the villains head.)

    Thumb up +5

     
  4. iwire

    May 25th, 2010

    I just know I’m gonna hurt my foot…kicking your ass.

    Thumb up +3

     
  5. Althing

    May 25th, 2010

    When asked why he did what he did to America Obama replies, “Well I’m all broken up over those Americans’ rights.”

    Thumb up +3

     
  6. Althing

    May 25th, 2010

    We could do an entire movie just called “Dirty Barry”.

    Thumb up +8

     
  7. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    Hero is cornered by illegal aliens. He then inexplicably stands with his hand over his heart and starts singing.(Sung to the tune of America.)

    My Country … SAYS A ME!!! (and knocks them all out with a Burt Reynolds punch from Smokey and the Bandit.)

    Thumb up +1

     
  8. Uncle Al

    May 25th, 2010

    Teddy Kennedy always said, “Life is like a box of chocolates. You know I’m gonna get ‘em all and you’ll never get any.”

    Thumb up +1

     
  9. Althing

    May 25th, 2010

    “Welcome to the House AND Senate of pain!” as our hero punches his fist through Pelosi’s face and all her Botox injections explode.

    Thumb up +3

     
  10. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Coming soon from Commie PicturesMichelle Obama stars as Boobeltarella.

    “We’re gonna bury more than turnips.”

    Thumb up +2

     
  11. cfm990

    May 25th, 2010

    Hey libtard, let me tell you about the Bill Of Rights. Hell, I’ll throw in a few lefts while I’m at it

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +11

     
  12. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama the destroyer

    “I’ve got two words for you, Bankrupt.”

    Thumb up +6

     
  13. Althing

    May 25th, 2010

    “Take a chill pill” as our hero drops Al Gore into a vat of liquid nitrogen.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +12

     
  14. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    You know what I’m gonna do? I’m gonna teach you the three “r”‘s

    Readin’, Ritin’, and Rhinoplasty! (elbow to the nose)

    Thumb up +7

     
  15. simply amazed

    May 25th, 2010

    In a film about the lurid fever swamps of Washington, DC, Patrick Kennedy says, “I’m gonna stick my head so far up your ass the water on my brain will quench your thirst!” to a stunningly beautiful 27 year old female Congressional aide.

    Thumb up 0

     
  16. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    My Country … SAYS A ME!!! (and knocks them all out with a Burt Reynolds punch from Smokey and the Bandit.)

    And when they came to, one of them said “wow, that’s gonna leave a bruise, and I’m not talking about a 12 pack either, but the kind that leaves a mark on your face and hurts, unless I got punched you with a can of beer in his hand, in that case I got a bruise with some brews and, uh…??

    I’m thirsty.

    Thumb up 0

     
  17. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama to Larry Sinclair

    Go ahead, make me gay.

    Thumb up +5

     
  18. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    I’m not thru with you by a damn sight! I’m gonna get Founding Fathers on your ass!

    Thumb up +8

     
  19. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    Bow on this, MOFO!

    Thumb up +2

     
  20. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    F#ck you, Kosshole!

    Thumb up +4

     
  21. Uncle Al

    May 25th, 2010

    As the great Tax and Spend shark circles the sinking U.S. economy, the nerdy aide says to his gruff congressman, “We’re gonna need a bigger tax!”

    Thumb up +7

     
  22. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Ted Kennedy “So you think you can swim?”

    Thumb up +2

     
  23. simply amazed

    May 25th, 2010

    Prominent civil rights lawyer (Elena Kagan?) with the ACLU, dressed somewhat like Lady Liberty, “Give me your tired your poor, your huddled masses, yearning for free shit!”

    Thumb up +2

     
  24. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Barack Obama – I’m gonna run this country like Kennedy’s fly planes.

    Thumb up +2

     
  25. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    As said to Obama “You didn’t win, stupid fag, we all lost!”

    Thumb up +4

     
  26. simply amazed

    May 25th, 2010

    Unruly mob of Nevada voters in a modern western political drama to Harry Reid, “Are you feeling lucky, Punk? Well – Are you?”

    Thumb up +1

     
  27. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Conservative Man “Don’t take this the wrong way, Barack, we just don’t like you.”

    Thumb up +2

     
  28. FaceFaceMan

    May 25th, 2010

    Hero jumps out behind Pelosi while she’s applauding calderone…

    (def in an Dirty Harry voice)

    “What’s that? You wanna give a standing ovation to that scum?! How about a standing OVULATION!!”

    (swift kick to the c**t!!!!)

    round house kick to Biden.

    Thumb up +5

     
  29. simply amazed

    May 25th, 2010

    Wise and somewhat cynical longtime observer of the political scene to shocked young, still naive, would be politician, “Grace is not required, once the bribes are earned”. (h/t to Edith Wharton)

    Thumb up +1

     
  30. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Ann Coulter “Even in this dress, I’m twice the man obama is.”

    Thumb up +6

     
  31. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    I’ll be Bachman!

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +10

     
  32. Althing

    May 25th, 2010

    “Here’s a fist you may not like!!!” as our hero punches the shit out of Kevin Jennings for teaching his kid lude sexual practices.

    Thumb up +6

     
  33. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama to his commie followers – “I made John Galt my bitch!”

    Thumb up 0

     
  34. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Oh, my bad. You said heroes not villians. :D

    Thumb up +1

     
  35. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Take your stinky paws off me, you damn dirty democrats.

    Thumb up +3

     
  36. My2Cents

    May 25th, 2010

    Jigsaw: “Most consider you to be the embodiment of hope and change; I consider you an abomination.”

    Thumb up +1

     
  37. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    I don’t think you understand, mr. You just pissed off my grandmother!

    Thumb up +1

     
  38. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    What is best in life? To crush the liberals; to see them driven from the Hill; to hear the lamentations of their ladyboy partners

    Conan the Teapartier

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +11

     
  39. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Even a dumb ass can give a speech with a teleprompter!

    Thumb up +3

     
  40. My2Cents

    May 25th, 2010

    Hero doubles his fists and says to slimey Democrat: “Say hello to my two friends: Thomas Jefferson and James Madison.”

    Thumb up +2

     
  41. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    I got all the time in the world. You don’t, but I do.

    Thumb up +3

     
  42. My2Cents

    May 25th, 2010

    “Let me introduce you to the business end of my 2nd Amendment rights.”

    Thumb up +1

     
  43. Wyatt

    May 25th, 2010

    “I have come here to chew bubblegum and kiss ass – and I’m all out of bubblegum.” Obama at his last State Dinner, courtesy of “They Live.”

    Thumb up +1

     
  44. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Forgiveness is between them and God. It’s my job to arrange the meeting.

    Thumb up 0

     
  45. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    January 20, 2012

    Hasta la vista … BARRY!

    Thumb up +5

     
  46. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? Then who the hell else are you talking… you talking to me? Well I’m the only one here. Who the f*ck do you think you’re talking to?, said Obama to his reflection.

    Thumb up 0

     
  47. DMac

    May 25th, 2010

    As he holds a gun to Ahmadinejad’s head-

    “Durka Durka, Mohammed Jihad, MOFO!”

    KABLOOOOOOOEY!

    Thumb up +1

     
  48. DMac

    May 25th, 2010

    “VOTE FOR ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  49. FaceFaceMan

    May 25th, 2010

    Hero…crashing the Barb Boxer re-election party…
    (again in DH voice)

    “Ya wanna know what’s on my mind? Well I’m gonna tell you…with my BRAIN FIST!!!”

    (ridiculousness ensues)

    Thumb up +2

     
  50. cfm990

    May 25th, 2010

    I hope you got your free health care,cause son, you’re gonna need it.

    Thumb up +3

     
  51. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    Chuck Norriss to a captured Muslim terrorist

    Start talking … or I’ll kick you in the nuts so hard you won’t even be able to get it up for the virgins in heaven

    Thumb up +6

     
  52. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama watching a porno. “I’ll have what she’s having.”

    Sorry, I thought it was funny.

    Thumb up +8

     
  53. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Ever notice how you come across somebody once in a while you shouldn’t have f*cked with? That’s us, Obama, the American people.

    Thumb up +2

     
  54. Vermont Woodchuck

    May 25th, 2010

    Mildred, your son wants to be an aristocrat.

    Ohmigod, what did you say, Gerald?

    I said, “Your son, Melvin wants to be an aristocrat.”

    Jesus, Gerald, “I thought you said a Democrat!”

    Thumb up +4

     
  55. Wyatt

    May 25th, 2010

    Section 25(a)(4)(iii) of the Health Care Bill: “I see dead people.”

    Thumb up +3

     
  56. 1773

    May 25th, 2010

    bite this, barney

    Thumb up 0

     
  57. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    OH … you were finished. Well, allow me to retort! What does Ann Coulter look like?

    What?

    Thumb up +2

     
  58. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    So vote once, vote tuh-wice, for Barcky Obumbles… you middle-class honkies.

    Thumb up 0

     
  59. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    I’m your HuckleBARRY

    Thumb up +1

     
  60. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    Does she look like a bitch?
    What?
    Does she look like a bitch?
    Nooh
    Then why do you keep calling her a bitch? Yes you do Keith. You always call her a bitch. And Ann Coulter don’t like to be called a bitch by anybody except the Tea Partiers

    Thumb up +3

     
  61. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    You’re the Democratic nominee!

    You make it sound like a death sentence.

    It is, but not like real death where they have a funeral, and they stick you in a box in the ground, and people come and mourn and say nice things about you, but a different kind of death, but death just the same.

    Thumb up 0

     
  62. Wyatt

    May 25th, 2010

    “Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, Teddy.”

    Thumb up +7

     
  63. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Barack to George “Yippee Kay Aye Brother Hutter.”

    Thumb up 0

     
  64. jclady

    May 25th, 2010

    He is only known by the fur hat on his head and he is feared by all libprogs. It is November 2, 2010. He is closing in on the O(bama)P(elosi)R(eed) trifecta. He is in the building — they are crouched in a closet, shaking. The door opens…a light falls upon the frightened faces…suddenly, quickly, he breaks the news

    ” Time’s up! Mwhahahahah”

    Thumb up +3

     
  65. cfm990

    May 25th, 2010

    Hey socialist,I’m gonna kick your ass so hard, your gold fillings are gonna land in your neighbors yard. That’s my idea of wealth redistribution.

    Thumb up +6

     
  66. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Hey Barack, I wonder if you’d lead better if that teleprompter was up your ass!

    Thumb up +1

     
  67. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Hey Hiney, Save Your Breath. You’ll need it to blow up your date!

    Thumb up +2

     
  68. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama speech after Iraq detonates a test nuke: The truth is, we acted too late. Only when our own national security was threatened, did we act. And aren’t we good little actors? As a matter of fact, I’m acting right now, playing the part of a concerned pResident. Do I smell an Oscar?

    Thumb up 0

     
  69. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    If this website wasn’t censored. I could have said XXXX and XXXX.

    Thumb up 0

     
  70. Soup2Nuts

    May 25th, 2010

    OK, this isn’t exactly action thriller, but does political comedy action count?

    “Blazing Weasels” The scene opens with a work crew building the border fence when our malcontent hero, Slim Pickens, carrying a shovel, skulks up behind the dazzling urbanite sheriff, Black Bart Obama. Black Bart wants Doofus Biden to send a note to Governor Brewer. Doofus reads Bart’s words back to him, “Tell the Governor that I say OW!” “Got it!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  71. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Captain Planet – Al Gore? That fat pile of monkey dung. He only thinks it’s global warming because he’s 200 pounds fatter.

    Thumb up 0

     
  72. Anonymous

    May 25th, 2010

    From the gritty thriller, Tax Payer.

    Disgruntled tax payer, Travie Bickle prepares to take on degenerates in Congress.

    “You talking to me? You talking to me? You talking to me? Then who the hell else are you talking to? You talking to me. Well I’m the only one here. Who the hell do you think you’re talking to? Oh yeah… huh… (pulls gun) okay… huh…”

    (holsters gun)

    “Listen you commies, you screw heads, here is a man who would not take it anymore, who would not let..”

    Listen you commies, you screw heads, here is a man who would not take it anymore, a man who stood up against the scum, the freaks, the pork, the lies, the insults, the total disregard for the US Constitution, the treason. Here is someone who stood up… here is… (pulls gun) you’re dead.

    Thumb up +2

     
  73. even steven

    May 25th, 2010

    ooops… log in mistake.
    Tax Payer was from me.

    Thumb up 0

     
  74. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    The most powerful man in the United States is President Barcky. You’ve heard of him? Joe Sestak is special counsel to the President. There’s a cartoon on his wall. The caption reads, “When you’ve got ‘em by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.” But that would only include the men. Well, the ones with actuall balls anyway. For the women he would need a cartoon that says “When you got ‘em by the nipples, their hearts and minds will follow”, but he doesn’t so I guess he’s only worried about people with balls, or something.

    Thumb up 0

     
  75. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    As Barbara Boxer shoots a member of the chamber of commerce in the face, “No one calls me Ma’am”

    Thumb up +3

     
  76. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    As a member of the chamber of commerce shoots Barbar Boxer in the face, “Pardon my manners, MA’AM”

    Thumb up +2

     
  77. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama: Don’t make me angry, you don’t want to see my…unclenched fist!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  78. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Insultor (strange visitor from the planet Asinine)

    “Your so boring, even boomerangs, won’t come back to you!”

    Thumb up +2

     
  79. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama: “You don’t want to see me bow when I’m angry!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  80. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    All these checks from Mexico?

    See?

    How come? Did the money originate there?

    Well, I doubt it started off as pesos.

    Thumb up +1

     
  81. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Ha Ha Javalina, LOL How about

    “You worked a long time to become a Senator, how long did it take you to become a bitch?”

    LMAO

    Thumb up +5

     
  82. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    ScratchNSniff-“You worked a long time to become a Senator, how long did it take you to become a bitch?”

    Winner

    Thumb up +3

     
  83. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    A reanimated zombie Eisenhower: “So, you don’t like Ike? Well, maybe –BLAM!!– Ike don’t like you.”

    Thumb up +2

     
  84. Menderman

    May 25th, 2010

    As Obama exits after November 2012 landslide:

    Let me be clear Hiney, You’re a loser!

    Thumb up 0

     
  85. cfm990

    May 25th, 2010

    Damn right I’m a racist,Human racist. This is how we deal with rats. STOMP.

    Thumb up +1

     
  86. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    Interrogator to terrorist

    My name is Ralph Miranda and before I give you your rights, let me lead off with a couple of LEFTS! (Scummphh! Whoommp! Huuuh!)

    Thumb up +3

     
  87. simply amazed

    May 25th, 2010

    Newly elected Sen. Haysworth (R, AZ) to Senate and White House democrats, “You gonna close that border boys or whistle Dixie?”

    Thumb up +2

     
  88. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Barack: What choice did I give the American people for dinner tonight?

    Raham: Well, we gave them a choice of hamburger or fish.

    Barcky: Yes, yes, I remember, I had the wagyu.

    Thumb up 0

     
  89. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    As the hero blasts Al Gore with a flamethrower, “Global warming? (lights cigarette on flaming Al Gore) Yeah, I’m feelin a little hot under the collar too.”

    Thumb up +3

     
  90. simply amazed

    May 25th, 2010

    Well armed AZ citizens, some months hence, to still unchecked waves of illegal Mexican and other immigrants, “Badges? Badges? We don’t need any badges! We’re legitimate citizens of the USA!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  91. even steven

    May 25th, 2010

    Signal 380 ppm

    Al Gore (in style of heartless, early ’60′s driver’s ed. film narrator):

    (narration over scenes of cataclysm)

    “They think mother earth can take a few more years of their old polluting, energy consuming ways. For their cheapness and ignorance, they will pay the ultimate price. The earth will become a lifeless cinder in twenty years.”

    Thumb up 0

     
  92. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    American public to Obama – Show me your papers Bizatch!

    Thumb up 0

     
  93. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    When shooting an evil scientist in the face, “The science is settled, you’re dead.”

    Thumb up +3

     
  94. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Barcky: Am I wrong?!

    Barckolytes: No.

    Barcky: Am I wrong?!

    Barckolytes: Yeah.

    Barcky: Okay then.

    Thumb up 0

     
  95. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    When shooting an environmentalist complaining about overpopulation, “You were overpopulating…my face!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  96. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    A little boy finally gets out of the corner where his mother had put him for cussing. He continues playing with his Arizona action set:

    “Attention All Illegals bound for deportation, blame the bitch in the kitchen for the 1/2 hour delay.”

    Thumb up +1

     
  97. Winterstorm

    May 25th, 2010

    Prez B.O. in Socialist Precedent (its just not hollywood without terrible puns)

    “Come with me if you want to live. In perpetual debt.”

    “RUN! GO! GET TO THE BORDAH!!!”

    *To the Constitution* “Remember when I said I’d kill you last? I lied.”

    “If I’m not me, who the hell am I!?” *after being told he didnt write Audacity of Hope*

    Yes, Barry is played by Arnold. Or at least voiced by him.

    Thumb up +1

     
  98. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    The name’s Lennie …. Call me Lennie

    Thumb up +1

     
  99. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    You’re a neo-marxist-zoom-dweebie! What would you be doing if you weren’t destroying the United States?

    Thumb up 0

     
  100. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Yoda “Fuck You, the Dark Side will.”

    Thumb up 0

     
  101. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Illinois Nazis.

    I hate Illinois Nazis.

    Thumb up +3

     
  102. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    American People: You’re a disgrace to our country. I’d like to know how you became President anyway.

    Barcky: You elected me.

    Thumb up 0

     
  103. even steven

    May 25th, 2010

    The Joe Biden Adventure

    The VP’s dramatic battle to survive beneath his canoe after capsizing in the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool.

    “Thinking uses oxygen. I saw that on television. I must not think. I must not think.”

    Thumb up +1

     
  104. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Danger Will Robinson, Danger! And I mean ‘Will’ as in the male human name, like Bill, Billy, or Willy; a derivitive of William, not like the document people read after you’re dead so that they know what to do with all of your stuff, but Will the man-child. If I were to say Danger Willhelmina, you wouldn’t be confused would you? But, in this case, Will is a male, so I felt a clarification was, um, you know, warranted.

    Thumb up +1

     
  105. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Sure you can see my birth certificate, when you pry it from my cold dead hands!

    Thumb up 0

     
  106. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Sure you can see my birth certificate, but first let me show you your spine! –Shplork!–

    Thumb up +1

     
  107. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    A terrorist steps off a plane in NY. Obama steps forward with a mean look in his eye and (dramatic pause) says, “Welcome…to New York.”

    Thumb up 0

     
  108. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    The hero, who looks an awful lot like Frank J., impales a terrorist Nazi illegal alien on a saguaro cactus and says,”Citizenship…revoked!”

    Thumb up +3

     
  109. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Dick Cheney is holding Harry Reid off the edge of a building by the pantleg. Harry Reid says, “Don’t kill me, don’t you have a heart?” Dick Cheney grimaces, “You bet I have a heart, it’s on the table next to my bed.” AAAAAAAA!!!!!

    Thumb up +4

     
  110. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Col. Jessop: You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at parties you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use then as the backbone of a life trying to defend something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said “thank you,” and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

    Barcky: *Gulp!*

    Thumb up +2

     
  111. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    Bow before Zod!!

    Thumb up +1

     
  112. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    When shooting a terrorist in the face, Dick Cheney says, “It’s open season…on your face.”

    Thumb up +1

     
  113. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    @ Snowball

    Colonel Jessup, did you order the waterboarding?

    YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT I DID!

    Thumb up +4

     
  114. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Sweet.

    Thumb up 0

     
  115. Chris

    May 25th, 2010

    “Barry, You’re talking to my friend America all wrong. Do it again, and I’ll stab you in the eye with a soldering iron”

    Thumb up +1

     
  116. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Gov Brewer shoves a stick of dynamite into the mouth of a mutant drug smuggling Canadian(!) illegal immigrant and lights it, saying “You’re not going to the end of the immigration line, you’re going to the front of the line…to hell!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  117. Ken

    May 25th, 2010

    “Catch.” “That’s a 45 round…the next one comes a lot quicker.”

    Thumb up +2

     
  118. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    “Wealth redistribution, huh? I prefer flaming gasoline from my flamethrower distribution.”

    Thumb up +2

     
  119. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Barney Frank interrogating an American who made a citizens arrest of a terrorist, “Won’t talk huh? Hey Massa! Get me…The Glove!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  120. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Chuck Norris round-house kicks Barney Frank into an open grave, “I’ve got an epitaph for ya, Slippery When Dead!”

    Thumb up +1

     
  121. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    You a funny guy Grayson, we like you. That’s why we’re going to crush and humiliate you last.

    Thumb up +3

     
  122. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    Frankly Barry – we don’t give a F#ck!!!

    Thumb up +1

     
  123. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    November 2010 – Set It Off!!

    Thumb up 0

     
  124. Javelina Bomb

    May 25th, 2010

    Fred Thompson waits impatiently to pull the switch during an execution of a terrorist, when the terrorist starts badmouthing America. Fred Thompson calmly lights his cigar, pulls out his pistol and says, my watch may not say midnight, but my pistol says it’s twelve o’ GLOCK. Blam!!

    Thumb up +4

     
  125. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    Remember Grayson when we promised to crush and humiliate you last –

    We lied

    Thumb up +4

     
  126. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    Take your stinking laws off me, you damn dirty libs!!

    Thumb up +1

     
  127. Horrorman18

    May 25th, 2010

    ” Just when things seem at their darkest, it’s time to break out the TEA & PARTY! “

    Thumb up +3

     
  128. Horrorman18

    May 25th, 2010

    ” Remember what they said about payback…November is gonna be the new bitch! “

    Thumb up +1

     
  129. Racist

    May 25th, 2010

    Alabama Ag. Commissioner Candidate to obama, “After We convict you of treason, You’re gonna be swinging from that tree Son!”

    Thumb up 0

     
  130. Horrorman18

    May 25th, 2010

    ” DEMOCRATS….NOVEMBER…BE AFRAID…BE VERY AFRAID!!!!

    Thumb up +1

     
  131. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    I have HAD it with all these motherf*cking snakes on this motherf#cking Hill

    Uncle Sam L Jackson

    Thumb up +6

     
  132. Uncle Al

    May 25th, 2010

    Small businessman hit with the latest round of tax and regulation hijacks a TV station and tells the world,
    “I’m mad as hell and you’re not going to take any more!”

    Thumb up +2

     
  133. Horrorman18

    May 25th, 2010

    ” Liberals… out of office…no one can hear you scream “

    Thumb up +2

     
  134. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    Congress – we must break you!!

    Thumb up 0

     
  135. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    “Looks like I picked a bad week to stop sniffing glue” from “Snakes on Air Force One”

    Thumb up 0

     
  136. Uncle Al

    May 25th, 2010

    Airplane pilot hero to childish petulant legislator:

    Bawney, did you ever hang around the gymnasium? Bawney, you like movies about gladiators?
    Bawney, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

    Thumb up +1

     
  137. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    “Life is hard – it’s harder if you’re stupid” “Never say sorry – it’s a sign of weakness” John Wayne

    Thumb up 0

     
  138. Call me Lennie

    May 25th, 2010

    Next time Eric Holder criticizes a statute without reading it

    “Mr Holder, here is a dime. Take it and call your mother and tell her that there is serious doubt about your remaining the Attorney General.

    Thumb up +1

     
  139. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    We tried being reasonable – we don’t like it!

    Thumb up +2

     
  140. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    Barry needs to know his limitations.

    Thumb up +1

     
  141. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    Sometimes if you want to see change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands.

    Thumb up +1

     
  142. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    I have a very strict gun control policy – if there’s a gun around I want to be in control of it.

    Thumb up +2

     
  143. Snowball the Sourpuss

    May 25th, 2010

    Uncle Al – Well I’ll be damned, you came back.

    ~

    “You seem like a nice guy, Uncle Al. I really do feel sorry for you. But if you still try anything or try to run away again, I’ll blow your fucking brains out!”

    Thumb up 0

     
  144. Uncle Al

    May 25th, 2010

    @Snowball – Catch me if you can, and adspice tergum

    Thumb up +2

     
  145. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    “Where did you find these pecker woods?” John Wayne, to Congress.

    Thumb up 0

     
  146. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Barack, you have the right to remain silent. Use it!

    Thumb up +1

     
  147. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    The Headstrongs married the Armstrongs and that’s why Barry was born – Groucho Marx

    Thumb up 0

     
  148. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    In Washington no one can hear you scream.

    Thumb up +1

     
  149. Moe Tom

    May 25th, 2010

    Gypsey Wedding, Big Brawl. Police questions Best Man.

    Sgt. Well now Harry could you tell me what happened?

    Best Man. Well sur I was dancin’ with the bride
    an’ Ollie, the groom, ya know, comes up and kicks her right in the arse.

    Sgt. Well now Harry was it a affectionate sort of kick or a hard one?

    It was a hard kick sur, broke four o’ me fu*kin’ fingers.

    Thumb up +2

     
  150. Moe Tom

    May 25th, 2010

    Now you can believe it or not. But that’s a true story.

    Thumb up 0

     
  151. Chalupa

    May 25th, 2010

    You see – We the People don’t like Congress laughing – we get the crazy idea that they’re laughing at us!

    Thumb up +1

     
  152. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama “the police acted stupidly.”

    Conservative Guy “Yo moma acted stupidly by laying it down fo yo daddy.”

    Thumb up 0

     
  153. McBain Burr

    May 25th, 2010

    WHAT THIS NATION NEEDS IS AN ENEMA!!!–Socialist Joker Obama in Ratman.

    Thumb up 0

     
  154. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    I’m here to form a more perfect union…
    My Fist and Your Face!

    Thumb up +2

     
  155. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    A lot of people still have the first dollar they ever made.
    Barack Obama is trying to get all the others.

    Thumb up +3

     
  156. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    One if by land – (punches villain)
    TWO if by sea! (kicks the villain in the nuts.)

    Thumb up +3

     
  157. ScratchNSniff

    May 25th, 2010

    Like a pretty girl on prom night, doesn’t matter what you wear you’re gonna get screwed.

    Thumb up +1

     
  158. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    Obama and our hero square off…
    Hero:
    Four out of five dentists agree,
    you have no TEETH!

    Thumb up 0

     
  159. BigFurHat

    May 25th, 2010

    Our hero drops Obama and Pelosi into the vat of acid as he lights up a cigar.

    Plop! Plop! Fizz! Fizz! (takes a puff) Oh what a relief that is…

    Thumb up +5

     
  160. Mr. Pinko

    May 25th, 2010

    “Plug the damn hole”

    Comments are closed

    Thumb up +2