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Settled Science

Home - by - January 3, 2014 - 23:45 America/New_York - 7 Comments

Late fall and the Indians on a remote reservation in North Dakota asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild.

Since he was a chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky, he couldn’t tell what the winter was going to be like.

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect firewood to be prepared.

But, being a practical leader, after several days, he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, ‘Is the coming winter going to be cold?’

‘It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold,’ the meteorologist at the weather service responded.

So the chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared.

A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. ‘Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?’

‘Yes,’ the man at National Weather Service again replied, ‘it’s going to be a very cold winter.’

The chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.

Two weeks later, the chief called the National Weather Service again. ‘Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?’

‘Absolutely,’ the man replied. ‘It’s looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters we’ve ever seen.’

‘How can you be so sure?’ the chief asked.

The weatherman replied, ‘The Indians are collecting a shitload of firewood’

ht/ bitterclinger



  1. jbinnout

    January 4th, 2014

    That’s a great one. As a kid I grew up in northern Idaho. I learned about cold. In southern AZ, cold is anything under 40F. Couple weeks ago my 5 year old grandson was getting ready for school on a 38 degree morning and yelled down the stairs. “Grandma, why do I have a long sleeve shirt and a jacket? It is cold out today! It’s not about all jacketty, it’s layers, layers, layers!”

    Thumb up +9

  2. Snowball the Sourpuss

    January 4th, 2014

    Heheheeee! That’s a good one! Gonna steal this one. Thanks bitterclinger and Fur!

    Thumb up +3

  3. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    January 4th, 2014

    Native Indian Broadcasting…This is a genuine weather report straight off a reservation TV station in North Dakota…


    Thumb up +4

  4. Billy Fuster

    January 4th, 2014

    Boobie, that’s hilarious.

    Thumb up +2

  5. Bob M.

    January 4th, 2014

    Ha! What did the Mighty Chief algore THEN say to THAT?!?! :oops:

    Thumb up +1

  6. MOE TOM

    January 4th, 2014

    Chief Algore speak with false tongue.

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  7. serfer62

    January 4th, 2014

    Never had wheels, no government, no writing, no laws…and they predict weather?

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