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Scarlett Johansson among front-runners to play Hillary Clinton

Home - by - May 28, 2013 - 11:00 America/New_York - 41 Comments

From the Bullpen – Boobie

 

LET THE COMMENTS BEGIN!
Gorgeous Scarlett Johansson may play squat, dreary Hillary Clinton in biopic.
Rodham director James Ponstoldt said: “Regardless of people’s political affiliation or how they feel about Hillary Clinton, you don’t find people who question the quality of her intelligence or her drive.”
Asked whether the final draft would include sex scenes, director Kim replied: “It’s an evolving process so I don’t know. She was an attractive 26-year-old with an amazing future.”

» 41 Comments

  1. Will Profit

    May 28th, 2013

    One of the California Raisins would have been an ideal choice.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +17

     
  2. thirdtwin

    May 28th, 2013

    Won’t happen. There is not enough money in the world to get Scarlett into a pantsuit.

    Thumb up +8

     
  3. Diann

    May 28th, 2013

    Hollywood: Doing their level best to give history a make-over.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +16

     
  4. KMM (CT)

    May 28th, 2013

    Is this a real Hillary pic or BFH-enhanced?
    Looks like cheeks impanted with ping pong balls and lips replaced with back end of an orangutan.

    Thumb up +6

     
  5. Will Profit

    May 28th, 2013

    @thirdtwin:
    Yeah, but Pantsuit would love to get into Scarlett’s pantsuit. Nudge, nudge. Wink, wink.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +11

     
  6. eternal cracker p

    May 28th, 2013

    It’s easier to grab a bum off the street and pay with liquor, at this point, what difference would it make?

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +14

     
  7. Stirrin the BS

    May 28th, 2013

    What a crock of shit. This is nothing more than a presidential campaign fundraiser. Everyone here at iOTW who plans on seeing the movie say aye…..

    ……chirp, chirp.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +12

     
  8. grayscape

    May 28th, 2013

    “…you don’t find people who question the quality of her intelligence or her drive.”

    We don’t question her “drive” for power at any cost including murder….but we do question her competence and leadership.

    Thumb up +9

     
  9. Anonymous

    May 28th, 2013

    I’m thinking Roseann Barr.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +22

     
  10. Navy Squid

    May 28th, 2013

    Francis, the Talking Mule would be my vote!

    Thumb up +8

     
  11. Troy

    May 28th, 2013

    Good one Fur,
    took me a minute to figure Bill’s text out.
    Now do our eyes a favor and post a pic of Scarlett during the opening scene of LOST IN TRANSLATION.

    Thumb up +3

     
  12. BigFurHat

    May 28th, 2013

    I did not have photoshop with that woman!

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +17

     
  13. Stranded in Sonoma

    May 28th, 2013

    This is Commander in Chief, part 2. Remember that piece of crap show? I never watched it either. You could tell it was hollyweird’s way of selling the idea that it was time for a woman president. Not sure why that made them think of Hillary, though.

    In the end, hollyweird settled for a black, homosexual, narcissist, socialist, anti-American dictator.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +12

     
  14. Boobie, Grammar Mallcop

    May 28th, 2013

    @KMM- “…back end of an orangutan.” Hahahahaha!

    I’m thinking there’s not enough money in the world to get Scarlett to gain 75 pounds for the role.

    Thumb up +3

     
  15. Alxandro

    May 28th, 2013

    And so it begins, Hollywood’s ass kissing of their next candidate.

    Thumb up +9

     
  16. Alxandro

    May 28th, 2013

    The actress to play Hillary must be “well hung”,
    she must have thick and girthy fingers.

    Thumb up +7

     
  17. thirdtwin

    May 28th, 2013

    @Stranded In Sonoma

    Remember “Star Trek: Voyager”? They were pumping the female commander thing way back when Cankles was hiding the Rose Law Firm billing records.

    Thumb up +8

     
  18. Boobie, Grammar Mallcop

    May 28th, 2013

    Anybody wondering what lost out to the lesbian movie (“Blue Is The Warmest Colour”) at Cannes?

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1291580/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

    Behind the Candelabra- Story of Liberace and his boyfriend starring our iOTW favorite, Matt Damon, and Michael Douglas.

    It’s gonna be a “gay” ol’ summer at the movies.

    Thumb up +4

     
  19. Stranded in Sonoma

    May 28th, 2013

    @Boobie — Here’s a quote from Robert Davi.

    Take a song that I sing on the album, All The Way, which won the Oscar in 1958 and juxtapose it with a song that won the Oscar just a few years ago It’s hard out there for a pimp, and you can see why we have an erosion of values.

    Davi’s the man!

    Thumb up +5

     
  20. norman einstein

    May 28th, 2013

    Johannson has the IQ of a curly fry lightbulb.

    She’ll probably let Bubba coach her, so she can get
    ‘into’ the character.

    Thumb up +8

     
  21. Moxie Man

    May 28th, 2013

    My pick would be Rebecca De Mornay ( http://static1.purepeople.com/articles/5/38/95/5/@/273402-rebecca-de-mornay-637×0-2.jpg ).

    She is aging better that Hillary, but with a little uglifying makeup and a trowel …

    Thumb up +4

     
  22. really really enraged

    May 28th, 2013

    @grayscape – not to mention any semblance of integrity and basic decency as Western Civilization would define it. I question her intelligence too – but not her sociopathic cunning.

    Thumb up +4

     
  23. really really enraged

    May 28th, 2013

    Grendel’s mother?

    Thumb up +5

     
  24. MNHawk

    May 28th, 2013

    Who is playing Juanita Broaddrick, Vince Foster, and most importantly, Huma Abedin.

    The hawt sex scenes between Scarlett and a mystery babe can make or break this extravaganza.

    Thumb up +4

     
  25. Diann

    May 28th, 2013

    It’s really a shame Divine died. He would have been a shoe-in

    Thumb up +7

     
  26. 123321123321

    May 28th, 2013

    Slick Willy: I want to play the part of Bill and this time I will be a faithful husband.

    Thumb up +4

     
  27. nco77

    May 28th, 2013

    My pick would be Kathy Bates

    Thumb up +3

     
  28. John F.

    May 28th, 2013

    Scarlett’s an UBER-exemplary celebri-drone. She’ll get it for sure.

    Thumb up +2

     
  29. scr_north

    May 28th, 2013

    Oh please let Bill work his magic once more and get this Johannsen skank into the sack. Then let her send some more nude photos of the event (she does like to send nude photos) and have them hacked out for all the world to see. Sit back and watch a wrinkly old Hilary react to seeing her wrinkly old husband destroy her biopic and her 2016 hopes. With luck she’ll be carrying.

    Thumb up +4

     
  30. Bob M.

    May 28th, 2013

    I’d hit it!!!

    In da’ mouf…

    Wif a BRICK!

    (and THEN she’d look MORE like Hitlery! ;-) )

    Thumb up +2

     
  31. Poonces

    May 28th, 2013

    Why Scarlett, did the cryptkeeper have a prior commitment?

    Thumb up +2

     
  32. Tim

    May 28th, 2013

    The Republic is dead.

    Long live the People’s Utopian Caliphate!

    This bitch (not the actress) should have been in prison for what, 20 years, now?

    Thumb up +5

     
  33. Dadof3

    May 28th, 2013

    I nominate Jabba the Hutt for the role.

    Thumb up +2

     
  34. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    May 28th, 2013

    @ MnHawk- If they even SUGGEST Salma Hayek for the role of Hummer Abeddin, there better damn well be a hot dance number. I don’t care if Hillary IS in the front row waiting to be served HER wine (dribbling down Salma’s leg) …

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvnL4dtqIY8
    (Don’t let the wife catch you watching this.)

    Thumb up 0

     
  35. Dadof3

    May 28th, 2013

    @ Tim. The actress has the same politics. All the way down the line. No diff, just her looks draw you in and make her easier to tolerate for those whow know not or care not.

    Kinda related to Dad’s advice to marry an ugly woman because a pretty one can leave you.

    I told him an ugly one can leave you too.

    “Yeah, but who cares?”

    Thumb up +2

     
  36. ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ

    May 28th, 2013

    My Gawd! The resemblance is absolutely striking!

    They could be sisters!

    Oh wait, let me put my glasses on….

    Gaaaaaaaaaaahh!!!!

    Thumb up +9

     
  37. beachmom

    May 28th, 2013

    Put some heavy thick eyebrows on Scarlett and you’ve got Hill.
    Never thought Johansson was that good looking. Great figure though.
    They’ll have to put a thigh suit on her.

    Thumb up +3

     
  38. Tiger Eyes

    May 28th, 2013

    I could duplicate Hillary with Mr. Potato Head parts. Who would want to play that shrew?

    Thumb up +1

     
  39. Anonymous

    May 29th, 2013

    is artie johnson still alive?

    Thumb up 0

     
  40. The Doktor

    May 29th, 2013

    “She was an attractive 26-year-old with an amazing future.”

    Apparently, this Kim person was as drugged out and high/drunk as Bill was when he married the bitch.

    Hippie Hillary (AKA – Clown Pants Bitch)

    Thumb up 0

     
  41. Tragic Redemption

    May 30th, 2013

    Evil is ugly. No matter how much you try to pretty it up. Scarlett will look as bad as Clinton shortly.

    That’s what mental issues combined with drug use and moral depravity does to humans. It rots them from the inside out…..

    Thumb up 0