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My, How Times Have Changed

Home - by - February 20, 2013 - 13:03 America/New_York - 20 Comments

I have the  Tee Vee on in the background as I work. I’m watching COZI TV.

It specializes in vintage programming. Marcus Welby is playing.

The show is about a guy who has “diabeetus.” Welby is concerned that the guy is gaining weight. (The guy looks like he needs a Sloppy Joe by today’s standards.) After a lot of yip yap and many commercials, it turns out the guy isn’t eating, he’s drinking because he’s going through a divorce. But then there’s a bit of a twist – the reason for his divorce is that the guy is a closet fruit.

He confides in Welby as to why he is losing his marriage and his beloved son. He can’t stop thinking about man ass. Welby looks him straight in the eye and tells him to go to a psychiatrist.

The guy says that “he isn’t crazy.”

Welby says, “that sounds like something your Dad would say,” implying that he is, indeed, in need of psychiatric help. He tells him that many guys in his situation have been helped through psychiatry.

The guy thinks about it, at home alone, in his study. After Emmy-worthy hand wringing, the guy pulls out a vial of insulin and does a Klaus Von Bulow. (I think this might be where he got the idea.)

The guy’s wife, of course, calls Welby after discovering him in a coma. Welby speeds over in his Chrysler Imperial with his magic black bag. After he pounds his chest a few times (????) the scene cuts to the guy putting on his tie in a hospital room, ready to go home (to recover from his shattered sternum.)

Welby doubles down. He tells the guy to go to a shrink. The guy finally agrees – roll credits.

I am amazed that this print wasn’t burned by the left, along with copies of Huck Finn.

 

» 20 Comments

  1. Mary Jane Anklestraps

    February 20th, 2013

    “After he pounds his chest a few times (????) the scene cuts to the guy putting on his tie in a hospital room, ready to go home (to recover from his shattered sternum.)”

    LOL.
    I accidentally inhaled coffee and sprayed it all over my desk just then.

    Thumb up +8

     
  2. Anonymous

    February 20th, 2013

    Ahhhh. Nostalgia TV. Pre AIDS.

    Thumb up +8

     
  3. Bad Brad

    February 20th, 2013

    I had a similar experience earlier this week although not the same subject matter. I love old westerns. One of my favorites, which is very seldom on anymore is High Noon. At the end I couldn’t help thinking that Ronald Reagan was throwing his badge in the dirt in front of us instead of Gary Cooper in front of the town.

    Thumb up +5

     
  4. AbigailAdams

    February 20th, 2013

    Reruns of pre-80′s tee vee — when a man was a man and a woman was a woman (with no stripper poles in site). Ahhhh.

    My guilty pleasure is old films on YT. My favorite actor is Leslie Gordon (killed by the Germans in WWII). My favorite film is Gordon’s “Pimpernel Smith.”

    We DVR “Leave It To Beaver” because of the simple morality and the cute humor; June doesn’t dress like a teenager and Ward is the head of the household.

    Thumb up +4

     
  5. Proof

    February 20th, 2013

    If this show aired on a major network today, Robert Young would be burned in effigy.

    Thumb up +8

     
  6. Twellsy

    February 20th, 2013

    Was watching Prisoner of Second Ave (circa 1975) and Jack Lemmon was in one of his tirades when he mentioned “blacks and fags”. In 1975 I wouldn’t bat an eye at that, but now, it was funny as hell.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +13

     
  7. AbigailAdams

    February 20th, 2013

    Is it personal, Mr. Hat?

    Did anyone else call “Marcus Welby”, “Makeus Sickby”?

    Thumb up +1

     
  8. BigFurHat

    February 20th, 2013

    I heard someone say, Mucous Welby.

    Thumb up +2

     
  9. VaGal

    February 20th, 2013

    Love COZI!!! Although I did watch a “Leave It To Beaver” episode where Beaver’s class were honorary Fire Marshalls and reported on their parents for fire safety violations. Gave me the creeps as I know where this has led.

    Thumb up +4

     
  10. BigFurHat

    February 20th, 2013

    Today’s Leave It To Beaver was good and bad.

    Beav gets wind that the water is gonna be turned off in the neighborhood, so he fills a bunch of buckets and sells the water to his friends.
    The parents of the kids are outraged and Ward has a talk with Beaver.
    He says that when he has stuff and his friends don’t he should share it. (blechhhh)
    So Beav asks his dad how long he’s known the butcher. Ward’s known him since college. So Beav asks him why the butcher doesn’t give him meat for free.
    Ward explains that the butcher is a businessman.
    Beav says, “So am I.”

    Beautiful!
    But, in the end, Beaver donates the money to his baseball team, which is fine. He can do what he wants with his money.

    Thumb up +5

     
  11. VaGal

    February 20th, 2013

    My kids have been shocked to hear the word “nigger” on several 70′s shows (All In The Family for instance). Of course it was considered to be a terrible slur, but not given the status it has today. Now it is bleeped out while G-D is commonly used. Ironically, there are few rap songs that don’t use it (or “nigga”) at least once if not several times. We sure have come a long way. /

    Thumb up +2

     
  12. J Frank Parnell

    February 20th, 2013

    Young plays Fritz, the Nazi love interest of the daughter of a Jewish professor in The Mortal Storm (1940). The story is about the rise of a totalitarian politician in an advanced civilization that learns to worship the state. Drama plays out in the lives of the professor’s family and friends in the German Alps circa 1930′s.

    Thumb up +2

     
  13. AbigailAdams

    February 20th, 2013

    @JFrank — Sounds like you’d also enjoy “Night Train To Munich”. It’s on YT.

    Thumb up 0

     
  14. AbigailAdams

    February 20th, 2013

    Gad! Leslie “Gordon” = Leslie Howard.

    Thumb up 0

     
  15. Dr. Tar

    February 20th, 2013

    So how would Hollyweird end this episode today?

    My Guess: Welby goes around town and points out all the successful people that are gay in the community. The patient learns to accept his gayness and is seen hand-in-hand with the a handsome man his own age. Everyone smiles approvingly – even the guy’s wife and kids.

    Thumb up +3

     
  16. Gays and Blacks

    February 20th, 2013

    Back then: no gays and almost no blacks on the tube. Now tv is run by Progressives.
    Blacks and gays everywhere.
    God how I miss the 50′s

    Thumb up +8

     
  17. Moe Tom

    February 20th, 2013

    Remember when the movie ended with a kiss? Didn’t think so. Now the movie begins with a raw hump.
    Old age sucks. But getting there used to be just fine. Not no more though. Today’s children are robbed of their youth by the gay-prog agenda.

    Thumb up +6

     
  18. scr_north

    February 20th, 2013

    Bits of trivia. The guy that wrote the theme for Marcus Weby also scored “Star Trek – The Voyage Home” and “Fantastic Voyage”. Didn’t Klaus shoot up his wife and not himself? In any event I’m surprised TV would even bring up anything gay during that period.

    Thumb up +3

     
  19. Tuesday

    February 20th, 2013

    Was this the show where his nurse was always drinking a Margarita? I believe she liked it with salt.

    Thumb up +1

     
  20. 99th Squad Leader

    February 20th, 2013

    I watch ME TV and Antenna TV. Great vintage programming like Hawaii Five-O, Rockford, All in the Family, Wild Wild West, Dragnet, Adam 12 etc.

    BFH should make his critique of beloved vintage shows a weekly feature.

    It would be fun reading BFH’s take on the episodes.
    The Marcus Welby synopsis is hilarious!

    Thumb up +1