Home - by Cardigan - January 25, 2013 - 11:45 America/New_York - 50 Comments
January 25th, 2013
Hey buddy, can u tell me where the town drunk lives..??
“Give us a little of that ‘Dixie,’ will ya, boy?”
Oh Barry you play so well, can you play “I Shot the Sheriff”?
In 2016 I’m gonna free you from those chains…
I luv IOTW. Happy B-lated anniversary Hat! Mayb one of these eve’s we can enjoy a pint in the city…
Swillary Rodman Clitstone
Yeah, you remember the old Crosby, Stills protest song “Ohio”?
Play it this way:
“Tin soldiers in Swillary’s army…
“….four dead in Benghazi!”
But where are your sunglases, Mr. Wonder?
Left Coast Dan
All you really need is shotgun shells.
Jill and I love us them minstel shows!
“Oh, Barack…I didn’t know you were so talented.
Wait! You’re not Barack! God love ya!”
…you know, “The Camptown Races”…
Whoredildo "Che" Rivera
Pay no attention to that smell. Like your weatherman bro, I just pooped my pants!
You got your real lord and savior right here. How’s “Biden-Foxx-2016″ sound to you?
Can you play an old Negro tune bro?
Do you know anything by John Denver or Bobby Goldsboro?
“Oops, the Champagne, burlesque piano & back of the head tramp stamp combo threw me off…sorry ’bout that Django…er, I mean Jamie.”
“Get your gay honky white hands off me!”
“Thanks for gushing about Obama, Jamie. Now, Jay-Z needs a drink refill. Sorry, but he’s more useful than you are.”
Angry Drunken Dwarf
“…When you was slaves you sang like birds”.
Hey my brotha, I dint know you was a fellow piana player!! I’s learned howta play the keys way down mississip’ way when I was jus a little chile.
Can you play, “I’m gonna get me a shotgun and kill every whitey I see” ?
Boobie the Rocket Dog
Well, looky here! Sugar Chile! Sugar Chile Robinson, all growed up! How ’bout you playin’ us some boogie woogie?
“Chain Chain Chain! Chain of Fooooooools!
Stevie! I thought your were blind?
How about trading me your pool boy for my wife?
“You boys do have such natural rhythm… when you’re done here, would ya mind gettin’ us some coffee?”
Hey Stevie bro can you play “On c clear day I can see for…oh heck, what am I sayin’ you can’t see boy, but we can.” Hee, hee.
Yo Boy……do you play BACKUP for Reggie Love when he is in town????
“I always did like you people’s music. You got rhythm, know what I mean?”
Major Mal function
Unchain my throbbing manhood, Django!
Mike Tyson, man I didn’t know you could play the piano.
“Don’t you go gettin’ any ideas from that Django movie son, you just sit here and play that piano for your keepers like you are supposed to.”
This is some big fuc**ng deal!!
“Play it again, Sambo.”
“SAY WHAT, CRACKA??!!!”
“You sure are clean and articulate. Smell good too.”
Keith in Seattle
Um, you got that blow I ordered? I need some to keep my eyes open during Obama’s lame speech…
“Yo, Joe. That Vulcan Death Grip mess you keep tryin’ ain’t gonna get me to play ‘Sweet Home Alabama’. Now quit axin’.”
“Aw, come on! That’s our song, man!”
“Your song? Your song’s gonna be ‘Let the Bodies Hit the Floor’ in a minute, dog!”
” Say Ray, do all blind black guys look a bit Chinese when they take their sunglasses off ” ?
“Ray, I can’t tell you how proud I am that Obamacare helped you get your eyesight back. Have you kicked the smack habit yet?”
Stranded in Sonoma
Hope it’s okay to touch you, because I don’t want to if that stuff rubs off.
I was just curious to see if you knew that you were black?
“Dee Camptown Races?” How about, “I get no kick from champagne”.
You keep playing “Mammy”, boy, they gonna put y’all back in chains!!
Now when I leave and come back onto this stage, I want you to play a rousing rendition of “Hail to the Chief!”
marcus tullius cicero
want to plant a wet kiss on them
full black lips of yours and make
Carlos The Jackal
“Barry sent me to ask you if you bleach your anus.”
Joe Biden: ” And I thought I was the world’s bigggest asshole!”
Hey Jamie how ’bout having a three-way with Barry and me.
“Hey boy – when you’re done, shine my shoes.”
“My old Grandma in Scranton had a little nigra houseboy that looked just like you…..”
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