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Lance Strongarm – Sporting A-hole of All-Time

Home - by - January 15, 2013 - 04:13 America/New_York - 27 Comments

I hope there will never be any public rehabilitation of this vile assbag. Forget about how I hated his guts for spawning Lycra clad doucheclones that pedal in front of your car as if you’re the nuisance. That doesn’t even factor into this rant. No, it was Armstrong’s destruction of the people who tried to set the record straight about his fraud. He’s been destroying lives for decades, all for self-aggrandizement and personal riches. This puke is said to be worth over 100 million dollars, all from cheating and from incinerating anyone who thought what he was doing was despicable.

He collected money in defamation suits because he tampered with witnesses and hired PR firms to polish the thin veneer over his rotten core.
Anyone else would slink away under a rock, never to be seen again. But the fact that he’s chosen to “come clean” on Oprah suggests that his public rehabilitation is set to start DURING THE CONFESSION.

He really should do some serious jail time.

Now they should investigate his second biggest revenue stream. His “cancer.”

» 27 Comments

  1. phil.arbeit

    January 15th, 2013

    I read an impassioned article from one of his former bicycle mechanics who was financially and socially ruined after finding out Lance did performance enhancing drugs. (He found them in one of Lance’s vacation homes in the medicine cabinet, and threw them away.) As BFH states, this guy was ruthless, using scorched earth policies on his detractors. If you look up A-hole in the dictionary, you should find this guy’s picture. I’m with Fur on this one, L. A. should never be allowed to show his face in public again and all those people he won defamation law suits against should get all their money back, plus interest. Cheat to Win

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +21

     
  2. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    January 15th, 2013

    I confess he had me fooled for a while.

    So now he’s teamed up with another charlatan, Orca Windbag. They deserve each other.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +17

     
  3. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    January 15th, 2013

    Great picture choice, Fur. That’s one evil-looking S.O.B.

    Thumb up +8

     
  4. AbigailAdams

    January 15th, 2013

    Dishonor. Dishonor to himself, his family, his country.

    That he should now cash in on his vile, calculated scheming in such a public way is testimony to the fact that reformation is not his goal. You’re right, Fur, if he were truly sorry for his misdeeds he would simply admit his wrongdoing and take his lumps. Immature people will always seek ways to justify the bad things they do.

    And Oprah? I guess she’s still around because I saw her picture on her magazine at the grocery store again this month. Scary.

    Thumb up +7

     
  5. Death_By_Farts

    January 15th, 2013

    I always thought that Natural Born Killers was a bizzare, twisted, sick movie….But I gotta admit I laughed out loud at the scene where Mallory blew away the douchebag riding his bike on the highway.

    I agree with BFH…I can’t stand biker-fags.

    In fact, here’s something for Bigfurhat and the rest of my friends on here that is sure to put a smile on your face ;)
    ENJOY!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IOLmKHgzI2M
    .

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +14

     
  6. Tracy

    January 15th, 2013

    FESSIN’ UP TO ZERO CREDIBILITY CANCELS ITSELF OUT
    (What Planet’s Lance Armstrong Living On)?

    . . . When you listen to Barack Obama, when you really hear him, you witness a very rare thing. You witness a politician who has an ear for eloquence and a tongue dipped in the unvarnished truth…
    — Oprah

    Thumb up +6

     
  7. sig94

    January 15th, 2013

    “Larry and the Lycra Clad Doucheclones”

    Simply awesome name for a progressive rock band.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +13

     
  8. grayjohn

    January 15th, 2013

    I simply cannot find the wherewithal to give a shit about this non story of a loser who duped people.

    Thumb up +4

     
  9. thirdtwin

    January 15th, 2013

    He is despicable and has ruined lives, but he hasn’t killed anyone to hide his secrets.

    You see where I’m going yet?

    When Barry is forced out of the closet next year and does his own Oprah rehab, let us remember Donald Young, Larry Bland and Nate Spencer.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +18

     
  10. McFartus Spontaneous

    January 15th, 2013

    Please dont call them “bikers”. Bikers ride Harleys, these fags ride bicycles, like my 11 year old.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +12

     
  11. Claudia

    January 15th, 2013

    I didn’t want to believe the stories, either. Not that I cared about him, but I was sad that we had a ‘hero’ taken from us at a time when we needed heroes. That said, I hope he rots away from his black evil heart.

    Now, if we could have strong courageous whistle blowers and investigators into Obama like those who blew this story.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +16

     
  12. Dr. Tar

    January 15th, 2013

    About the only redeemable aspect of this story is that at least this country tries to hold the cheaters accountable on some level – like the recent Baseball Hall of Fame nonselection this year.

    http://baseballhall.org/news/press-releases/2013-hall-fame-vote-shutout

    Thumb up +4

     
  13. J Frank Parnell

    January 15th, 2013

    When uber-narcissisist Lance is living in a 2 bedroom tract home working for shit wages in a bicycle shop after all the people he destroyed take him to the cleaners, then I will believe his contrition.

    Sombitch lives in Moscow On The Colorado, should be plenty of commiefaggot bicyclists to keep him busy. Birds of a feather and all.

    Thumb up +9

     
  14. BILL

    January 15th, 2013

    “Lycra clad doucheclones that pedal in front of your car”

    all dressed alike, like their mommy laid out their clothes for them.

    bunch of “wanna be” pro sportsman!

    Thumb up +3

     
  15. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    January 15th, 2013

    @ Death_By_Farts – That was strange . . . until you watch it on YouTube instead of the right-side-truncated version that appears here.

    For a good time, watch the original and see what’s missing:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=IOLmKHgzI2M
    .

    Thumb up 0

     
  16. Truthsayer221

    January 15th, 2013

    I liken it to confessing your sins only after you have already gone to hell. What good does it do now and who gives a rats behind? Lance is a disgrace, he should seek residence under a rock.

    Thumb up +1

     
  17. Col. Angus

    January 15th, 2013

    “Lance Armstrong confessed to Oprah Winfrey”

    100 Hail Baracks and sprinkle your nut with green tea and ye shall be forgiven.

    Oprah wept.

    Thumb up +7

     
  18. missinmich

    January 15th, 2013

    “Lycra clad doucheclones”

    We here in West MI refer to them as “neon deer”.

    So the ball-less wonder finally admits to what most of us already knew. Ya know, if I could live to see everyone on my “list” reap what they have sown, I’d live a hellofa long time.

    Thumb up +5

     
  19. Corky

    January 15th, 2013

    He became a nobody to me when after he recovered from his cancer someone asked about God and he said God had nothing to do with him getting better. Okay, fine–he’s an atheist. Then he went on to say bicycling was more important than his family. I hope his ex-wife is very happy that she got out of that situation and that her money is untouchable in that rain of destruction I hope comes down on his head.
    BTW I just read that Oprah said he didn’t say what she thought he would. Are you surprised?

    Thumb up +7

     
  20. thirdtwin

    January 15th, 2013

    If they are gonna saddle me with a mileage tax, make the pedalphiles register their schwinns and pay a yearly fee for using the roads.

    Thumb up +4

     
  21. norman einstein

    January 15th, 2013

    Punk-ass loser.
    Like all cheating bastards, he’s not the least bit “sorry”.
    Except for the fact that he got caught.

    Not that I GAF, but I thought Orca retired. I guess the lure of a “scoop” was too much to resist.

    If she had a sense of humor, at the end of the interview, she would have given him a car!

    Thumb up +4

     
  22. Ohio Dan

    January 15th, 2013

    If Liberace can can sue and win a case against a newspaper that said he was a homosexua, Armstrong could show up at court with a half dozen needles and a gallon of bovine steroids and win.

    Thumb up +1

     
  23. Rio

    January 15th, 2013

    I’m no expert on the Tour de France, but when guys spend their lives trying to win the race only one time …it was obvious Armstrong was cheating after the second win. Seven wins! haha what a greedy thug.

    A Leopard doesn’t change its spots.

    Thumb up +3

     
  24. dapenguin

    January 15th, 2013

    First off he left his wife who had cancer to hang with cheryl that should have been a clue. second and this is most important. I dont give a rat’s ass about this moron, we have a president trying to steal our rights away and this is another distraction.

    Thumb up +6

     
  25. Dan

    January 15th, 2013

    LIFETIME BAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GTFO!!!!!!!!!!!

    Wee need to commence operation restore integrity and deal harshly with anyone who shows such an appalling lack of honesty and integrity.

    Its why I refuse to shop at Dicks, all these other places with morons supporting the gun bans.

    Thumb up +2

     
  26. Trixie Bluebell

    January 15th, 2013

    So, he’s not only a cheater but a liar! Who’d a thunk? Never could stand him. Slime bag walked out on his sick wife after she tended to him during his cancer treatment. He disgusts me and living in a two bedroom tract home is too good. He needs to be in a rusty single-wide out in the desert. Lots of space for him to ride his bicycle.

    Thumb up +1

     
  27. phil.arbeit

    January 15th, 2013

    @ Thirdtwin

    Pedalphiles…wow! Excellent. Does it meet @McFartus’ disdain test?

    Thumb up 0