THE 12TH IMAM FINALLY ARRIVED? HELL NO!
What? Don’t imams have clocks in Islam? Don’t imams wear watches? Doesn’t anybody over there have an hour glass or something? Maybe a sun dial, you miserable savages? What is it with those fuzzy little varmints over there in Allah land? Every day AWD hears from some bass-ackward Muslim leader flapping his pie-hole about the “ushering in of the 12th Imam” and how he will destroy America and Israel, the Great and Little Satans! Well, I wish the 12th Imam would hurry up and usher his slow ass into action…I’m getting sick and tired of waiting around! Let’s go, 12th Imam…meter’s running, ya ig’nant bastid!
Today, another savage little fuzzball Muslim leader in robes said Joooos will be exterminated when the 12th Imam returns. Yeah, yeah, yeah, tell somebody that believes in your stupid hocus pocus, Hadji! Last week, it was Syria that was going to spur the return. Before that, it was some other middle east hellhole that was going to spur the return of the 12th Imam! Before that, it was Muslim womerns wearing western clothing that was going to spur the return!
Know what I think? I think this 12th Imam cat is lost! He’s as lost as a woman trying to remember where she parked her car at the mall. Or maybe he’s on a two-month drunk or something! Hell, he could be following the NASCAR circuit and got drunk as a whale poot in Talledega for all we know. Or maybe he thinks he’s the 13th Imam and is also waiting for the return of the 12th Imam. Maybe this “spurring in” of the 12th Imam is exactly what needs to happen….like sticking a spur in his butt to get his lazy ass out of bed and return, for heaven’s sake!
You know, Muslims don’t appear to be very bright. You can’t be bright and believe all the sh*t they believe. Let’s face it, anyone who can be made to believe that by blowing themselves up and killing innocent people will win them 72 virgins in heaven isn’t going to cure cancer anytime soon. Also, I mean, let’s face it…does anyone really want 72 virgins anyway? Maybe a few would do to spice things up but, for the Big Sexy, I like my womerns a tad on the trashy side, baybah. So I have a great idea to calm things down in the wacky world of Islam! All we have to do is slip in a fake 12th Imam…it’s not like they have a picture of him….to get those terrorizing sumbitches to settle down over there. Or get those camel-humping cavedwellers laid. With a woman. For once.