iOwnTheWorld.com

Hillary auditions for the Victoria’s Secrets job.

+5

Is there a nose hair??

+3

Hillary,tries to fashion a coherent thought!

+2

definitely not Victoria’s Secret…maybe a model for their new Big Vickie large size shop?

+1

Franklin, she’s comparing her sphincter to YOUR hat.

+6

Abhoth, Shub-Niggurath, Yidhra, Kaajh’Kaalbh, grant me your all encompassing protection from my inquisitors.

+5

After I’m retired imma gonna go to Denver and smoke a doobie THIS BIG!

+3

Put your head up between my thighs; I’ll crush it like a grape.

+2

“They’ve got me by the balls on this Benghazi thing.”

+1

Huma told me that Anthony can take a but plug this big.

+2

Imaging the choke hold she should have put on Monica

+2

Bill said he had her by the top of the head like this…

+2

The vagina on Huma was THIS big…

+3

“Huma has this luscious little a$$ that just won’t quit. Aguilera’s boobs are nice, but Huma’s a$$ is the stuff of dreams.”

+6

I see a stranger … a dark mysterious stranger…

+4

…and when I woke up from all the Martinis I saw a dick in my face this big….

+1

KSM’s head was tilted back like this and I picked up the wet towel with both hands to place over his face and

+1

…and then I saw Michelle’s nut sack…

+4

I can’t feel my dick.

+3

And I had her by the upper thigh, like this, and was darting my tongue in and out of

+2

Lying Bitch

+1

No it wasn’t a Margarita, it was a Super-rita. About this big. Three of them in fact, well maybe four or five… urrp!

+1

Huma must be inside the podium.

+5

Is she levitating something? What the fuck is that?

And now for my next trick….

+2

Yyyyessss mmmmisterrrrr sssssoooorrroooossss……

+2

I swear I put a period on the line after the link. Honest!

+3

UN RIM Council prayer.

+1

This is how you hold the girls head, and then, the iman gives her a little snip in her lady parts.

+3

“…And that’s when I realized I caught my dick in the zipper.”

+6

Yes, I drank four fish bowls of wine this big …

+4

My weight problem?
I believe its caused from eating hamburgers this big!

+1

So I pushed them titties together like this and absolutely melted.

+4

So I parted barrys asshole, tilted my head back and said “get ready I’m about to insert my head”.

+4

So I put my hands around Bills throat and said “how could you? Monica was supposed to be for me”!

+3

I GOTTA SHIT NOW!

+1

I know you think theres a hole in my Benzai story this big but…..

+2

“Please lord of Satan, the disciple of evil I command you to enter into me now”!

+2

“Please god, have mercy on me, I thought you weren’t real, and only progs were Gods”.

+2

So after my third margarita this big I thought Fuck it let embassador Stevens fight them off on his own.

+3

I wanted to grab Christina Agulieras’ boobs *LIKE THIS* sooo badly but the press corps was there.

+2

Hellary tries to channel The Amazing Kreskin .

+1

Press – You could win in 2016 hands down

Hillary – Her first ever “big O”

+2

I held her head under water like this but the bitch just wouldn’t die. It was then I realized Bill wasn’t the Beast. Another would slay Babylon….and be the first thrown into hell.

+2

“I…..ah…..almost had……..ah…..almost had my hands on the situation…… Then, I lost control. Please! Pleaaasssee forgive me. Give me another chance. You must give me another chance!”

Hillary Clinton
Explaining to her masters at UN about her failure to further the Agenda 21 plan of world domination laid out by them.

+2

The zit under my tit was THIS big…

+1

OH MY GAWD!! Is THAT what an orgasm feels like? I thought it took a dick this big, but an artful tongue can do just as well in the mouth of an expert, Huma.

+1

Please, God, I promised You I would save the world and I will keep that promise, in spite of BO. But YOU have to help me by keeping me beautiful and healthy. Otherwise the world will go to hell. Oh, and make sure I get to keep my guns even if we have to collect everyone else’s guns. Of course You and I know that the crooks will be able to get guns, but let’s not tell that secret to the gun-grabbers.

+1

Yes i can still piss standing up. And I don’t need to use my hands either. Now get me my fucking cowboy cuspidor you annoying peons.

+2

forget this little red vibrating egg, I need a real women!!

+1

QUITE! QUITE!
SILENCE!
YES YES , I SEE IT NOW,
HHHHHMMMAAHHHHHHHHHOOOOHHHHHHHHH,
I CAN SEE IT ,
That person with the red hair and brown eyes in the audiance wearing a green cord jacket ,
If you don give me back my GLASS BALL I will set obama on to you, OH sorry MR BIDEN I did not recognize you in your disguise.

+1

Oh so I got a concussion ! Can’t testify about the big fuggup at Bengazi .. LOL that Black African king wants to stick his 8 X 20 dick in me !! LOL

MY asshole will get bigger than ol MOOcheles bush twat

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**sniff sniff** I smell pussy….*drool*

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