» News

Sh%t Southern Women Say

Home - by - November 14, 2012 - 23:00 America/New_York - 40 Comments

* Contains Salty Language*

 

h/t  Reiuxcat

 

» 40 Comments

  1. old_oaks

    November 14th, 2012

    Again, not a single sangawitch was made.

    Thumb up +9

     

  2. Bad Brad

    November 14th, 2012

    I’m torn between, this was really stupid, to, I hear the same stuff where I live and It’s in Cali. (except the ever hated U all) to, I want to meet the girl with the big ass bandage on her knee. I bet she could pop the wax out of your ears.

    Thumb up +5

     

  3. Mary Jane Anklestraps

    November 14th, 2012

    Heehee. Bless their hearts. :)

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +15

     

  4. Nutjob

    November 14th, 2012

    and not a single, “he has his own doublewide”

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +13

     

  5. Mr Happy

    November 14th, 2012

    Anyone else here think Southen Accents on women, especially the North Carolina variety, are 100 proof boner fuel?

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +22

     

  6. RWF

    November 14th, 2012

    I think this is funny as hell. And damn accurate.

    Why do I have legs like that chick with all the bruises and band aids? I didnt realize that was a Southern thing. LOL

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +19

     

  7. Rio

    November 14th, 2012

    ya’ll come back now..ya’hear?

    Thumb up +5

     

  8. Bayouwulf

    November 14th, 2012

    It’s humor! Laugh for goodness sake. I live in East TN and hear a lot of this. We don’t mind poking a little fun at ourselves occasionally. You should try it. Really.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +20

     

  9. old_oaks

    November 14th, 2012

    Hee Haw!

    Thumb up +1

     

  10. mkultra

    November 14th, 2012

    Mrs. mkultra is a native Texan. :D

    Thumb up +6

     

  11. Doc

    November 14th, 2012

    I’ve seen legs like that before.

    Thumb up +3

     

  12. Edith McCrotch

    November 14th, 2012

    @ Mr Happy…

    Probably Carolina wimin…the Duke Mayonnaise and the love/hate Clemson comments got me leaning that way…

    …if only they’d said that they HATE Duke (Blue Devils), now THAT would of nailed it down right there.

    Thumb up +8

     

  13. racist

    November 14th, 2012

    If I wanted to hear that crap, I’d turn off the computer and to back in yonder. and I didn’t say I NEEDED another boat, I just said I’s gettin another boat! Don’t make no damn difference how many I got in the yard daggumit!

    Thumb up +7

     

  14. Plain Jane

    November 14th, 2012

    So what’s wrong with asking if the pistol comes in pink?

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +11

     

  15. Bad Brad

    November 15th, 2012

    Plain Jane
    Not a good color for concealment. Pink AR’s not practical unless your going shopping. Tactical failure.

    Thumb up +6

     

  16. AbigailAdams

    November 15th, 2012

    I always figgered that so long as there’s a suthern acksent there’s still an America. Bless our little ‘ol hearts.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +14

     

  17. Menderman

    November 15th, 2012

    Mr. Happy….YUP!

    Thumb up +3

     

  18. Menderman

    November 15th, 2012

    and as a North Carolinian, I do use the words “reckon”, “ain’t”, “yonder”, “y’all” and use the phrases “tight as tree bark”, “Tight as a tick”, “serious as a heart attack” and a lot of the stuff these baby dolls say…and a man can not have enough boats, guns or fishin poles!

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +17

     

  19. Who Dat

    November 15th, 2012

    I like to put it on extra thick when I’m around Yankees.

    Thumb up +9

     

  20. Plain Jane

    November 15th, 2012

    Bad, guess you are right. Darn.

    Thumb up +1

     

  21. Sarthurk

    November 15th, 2012

    They lost me when they said you don’t need another boat.

    I hope they can swim.

    Thumb up +3

     

  22. Unruly Refugee

    November 15th, 2012

    Listen, I live (by accidental misfortune) real close to Dog Patch, Arkansas, and not far from Toad Suck — I shit you not, and I can verify that about half of that talk is geographically correct. Sounds a lot like my family in Texas.

    Not one “Shit Fire!” though, so it can’t be authentic.

    Noteworthy Comment Thumb up +10

     

  23. Unruly Refugee

    November 15th, 2012

    I remember the first time I bought gas in a small town in the South and after I paid the lady at the cash register and started to walk to my car she said, “y’all come back now”, so I turned around to see what she wanted and all I got was a strange look. Had to fill up my tank a few more times before I figured that one out.

    I’m fixin to cook me some Spam. Ya want sum?

    Thumb up +5

     

  24. Boomer

    November 15th, 2012

    Luvemall Bless their sweethearts, Shonuf we all need more guns,jess lookie at the shite in the whitehouse ,bastid an white HO Hillery wants to take all our guns away from us I can’t belive somany dumbshits voted for the pice o shite.. LOL whats the world comming to ? gun control shit civil war babe .. bring it on .I can’t run sso have to stand and fight till I run out of ammo .LOL

    Thumb up +3

     

  25. todak

    November 15th, 2012

    What!? No mention of “shakin’ like a dog shittin’ razor blades” or “slicker’n snot on a doorknob”?

    Thumb up +5

     

  26. cfm990

    November 15th, 2012

    And I helped!

    Thumb up +3

     

  27. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    November 15th, 2012

    Reminds me– I LOVE Barbara Mandrell… still.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NN50ZU6jVwM
    .

    Also like Cletus T. Judd’s follow-up:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FV8cW5SONCI
    .

    Thumb up +2

     

  28. ICook2

    November 15th, 2012

    Too funny! Thanks for sharing. :)

    Well, I best git back to my chores. I’m fixin’ to fry up some yard bird fer supper.

    Thumb up +6

     

  29. Stirrin the B.S.

    November 15th, 2012

    I might could come up with a few more phrases they missed.

    Thumb up +6

     

  30. Billy Fuster

    November 15th, 2012

    The best part was the banjo music at the end.

    Thumb up +1

     

  31. MrsGilbertCracker

    November 15th, 2012

    That was funny! And so true! I say stuff like ALL the time (I’m a Georgia Peach). My favorite saying is “my ass in a mayonaisse jar!” :D

    Thumb up +3

     

  32. Corona

    November 15th, 2012

    I’ve never seen meth legs before. Is that a Southern thing?

    Thumb up +2

     

  33. JPK

    November 15th, 2012

    That just made me bust out laughin’.

    Thumb up +2

     

  34. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    November 15th, 2012

    “I’d have every girl child sent to Georgia to learn to smile and talk with that Southern accent; it drives me wild!”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FnhKpdgHSO8&bpctr=1352990606
    .

    Thumb up +1

     

  35. Boobie the Rocket Dog

    November 15th, 2012

    Hah! “Owprah’s new network SUUCKS!”

    Thumb up +2

     

  36. OTA Mom

    November 15th, 2012

    @Unruly Refugee: I’m familiar with that territory as well :) “Shiiit faaar”

    I grew up hearing my mother say “I’m gonna beat the faaar outta you”, and had no idea what she was saying until many years later.

    Thumb up +2

     

  37. Rick

    November 15th, 2012

    Bayouwulf, Western TN here, and a phrase they left out is “Well, he NEEDED killin’”.

    Also, beware any Southern woman that stares at you and then says “Oh HELL no!”

    Thumb up +4

     

  38. BC

    November 15th, 2012

    They sound normal to me…

    Thumb up +2

     

  39. Bayouwulf

    November 15th, 2012

    Touche, Rick. In fact, the phrase “Well, he needed killin” is justifiable defence in a lotta courts down South. Aint’ it great livin in Dixie?

    Thumb up +2

     

  40. Ernest T. Bass

    November 15th, 2012

    yeah… and nothing looks as fine as southern women.

    Thumb up +2