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Military Absentee Ballots Delivered One Day Late, Would Have Swung Election For Romney
WASHINGTON, DC – Sources confirmed today that hundreds of thousands of military absentee ballots were delivered hours after the deadline for them to be counted, with preliminary counts showing that they would have overturned the vote in several states and brought a victory for Governor Mitt Romney.
Officials say the ballots were delivered late due to problems within the military mail system. Tracking invoices show the ballots sat in a warehouse for a month, then they were accidentally labeled as ammunition and shipped to Afghanistan. At Camp Dwyer, Marine Sergeant John Davis signed for them and was surprised at the contents.
“I told Gunny we got a bunch of ballots instead of ammo,” Davis told investigators earlier today. “He told me to file a report of improper delivery and that the chain of command would take care of it. We didn’t hear anything for three weeks. While we were waiting we came under fire so we dumped a bunch of them in the Hescoes. We didn’t dig those ones back out.”
After military officials realized the initial error, the ballots were then sent back to the U.S. but suffered a series of setbacks.
Twelve boxes of ballots were dropped overboard during delivery to the USS Kearsarge (LHD-3) in the Persian Gulf, then while the ship sailed to Bahrain, postal clerks allegedly pocketed whatever ballots they wanted.
The remaining absentee ballots were loaded onto a C-130, but the flight was delayed until November 1st so the crew could get tax free pay for the month. Once the ballots arrived stateside they were promptly mailed to each state’s counting facility, reaching their final destination on November 7th.
pookie18
November 8th, 2012
Good satire…is always rooted in truth…
Toaster
November 8th, 2012
Officials say the ballots were delivered late due to problems within the
military mail systemMarxist crooks in the executive branch of government.Fixed it
Callmelennie
November 8th, 2012
Read before you comment, folks. This is a “story” taken from a faux news blog that’s trying to be like the Onion. Read the titles of some of the other stories and you’ll see
Xavier
November 8th, 2012
We can get rocks from the moon in a week but can’t transport small pieces of paper from Afghanistan in 45 days.
UNCLE KINK
November 8th, 2012
It’s a National disgrace that the very people that put their lives on the line for this country can’t even vote for CIC.
It’s gonna be a long 4 years.
Blink
November 8th, 2012
Yeah sure, I believe this was caused by fubar logistics. These warriors in dangerous places on our behalf have deserve to have their votes counted.
Denial of votes by out of country military personnel has been a problem in past elections and it’s not being solved because politicians don’t want it solved. In an age of secure, encrypted and verified network messaging there is no reason for this happening.
sux 2b us
November 8th, 2012
if any of you can stand that moral victory crap malkin’s got a list of 21
http://michellemalkin.com/2012/11/07/20-things-that-went-right-on-election-day/
plus. beckradio just said catholics gave us a THREE percent incresase in votes over the 45% Cs that voted for mclame in 08
Dano
November 8th, 2012
Yeah right… The “people”, unfortunately, have spoken. And WE as hard working, tax paying individuals must PAY for the slackers of the world so they can live WITHOUT having to lift a finger and produce! The first Affirmative Action President has been re-elected and the bitter pill has been swallowed!
dba_vagabond_trader
November 8th, 2012
Storm victims were able to cast ballots via email,Ohioans registered the day of, but to he11 our troops?
Treason!
Hmmm
November 8th, 2012
If this is true, send Drudge the info.
RANDO
November 8th, 2012
Had me going there, for a while.
Moe tom
November 8th, 2012
Not funny, like throwing salt on the wound
RosalindJ
November 8th, 2012
Callmelennie is right. I got roped in once too. Even forwarded it (ahem) with a correction about two minutes later.
That aside, I wonder if Heinlein had something there about only people who have served in the military having the right to vote.
UNCLE KINK
November 8th, 2012
Probably wouldnt have swung election but many weren’t able to vote.So,that sucks.
Stranded in Sonoma
November 8th, 2012
@RosalindJ — Actually, it was citizenship and there were very few things that gave it to you. One was military service, though the active military didn’t get to vote.
The problem with that is the socialists. They would find a way to subvert it, as they do with all things they dislike.
The best way is to limit the voters to those that own property. City-living socialist apartment dwellers don’t vote. Suburbanites and rural folk with property and lots to lose, do get to vote.
There should also be a 1 representative limit to large metro areas. NYC gets just 1 rep, as do LA, Chicago, etc.
Anne
November 8th, 2012
The big story should be that not just Obama, but the entire Obama Administration has been such an unmitigated disaster that it is mind-boggling that Obama got any votes at all.
dba_vagabond_trader
November 8th, 2012
Only assholes toy with friends and allies. Kinda like BHO. Thanks bfh.
Moe tom
November 8th, 2012
Listen to the 90 minute lecture by Bill Whittle. A novel idea. I wish I were younger. I’d get involved. I will definitely support him when he streamlines it.
Brian
November 8th, 2012
What refutes your snotty theory is that you’re an
asshole, and you’re too lame to toy with anybody.
Ron Pagano
November 8th, 2012
PEOPLE…is no one going to do a little research and find out that this article is NOT TRUE?? 8 MONTHS AGO?? Ballots weren’t even printed until SEPTEMBER, people!!!!It is a satirical piece, not meant to be taken seriously. Sarcasm…that’s all! Who really thinks that the military throws out the mail, drops deliveries in the ocean, etc?? If they did, then they deserved the outcome…BUT, it’s NOT TRUE!!! C’mon, people…get real!!
Badgerdad
November 8th, 2012
I hope everyone know this is satire. Duffleblog is the Onion for military folks.
Sputnik
November 8th, 2012
Can’t believe you all are this gullible. Sheesh……complete middle school and try again….
TN Tuxedo
November 8th, 2012
@Sputnik
Gullible? No, no, no, my friend. The gullible are the ones who voted for four more years of Obama based on the promise that they would be better than the LAST four; that it would be everyone else’s liberties that he would take away, not theirs.
The fact that so many reasoned, well-informed people – including myself – were initially taken in by this article speaks volumes not about us, but about this administration
Alpha Maser
November 8th, 2012
It’s a satire sight, wish it was true.
MaryfromMarin
November 8th, 2012
Although the Duffel Blog article isn’t true, I believe this one is:
http://www.examiner.com/article/cast-aside-thousands-of-votes-from-our-military-troops-uncounted-or-missing
Plenty of military personnel were denied their right to vote, in many ways.
joemo
November 8th, 2012
My God are you people stupid. Yee-haw, Obama for four more years. What are you inbred cornshuckers going to do about it?
Nutjob
November 12th, 2012
Clinton mastered this same democratic ploy when he ran for his 2nd term, so don’t kid yourself on Barry being the only democrat who pulled this trick,, somehow no one sent for the military ballots when Hillbilly was president……just slipped everyones mind.
Nutjob
November 12th, 2012
My God are you people stupid. Yee-haw, Obama for four more years. What are you inbred cornshuckers going to do about it?
Piss in your watermelon next time you cityfolks stop by for your farm fresh melons.
Ten Megaton
November 13th, 2012
Officials say the ballots were delivered late due to problems within the military mail system.
Bull fucking shit.
Don’t know about you, but I have had it with this lying, cheating, worthless bunch of mother fuckers.
Lock and load.