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“Reverend” Sun Myung Moon Goes To Hell
BIG HAIRY NEWS (BHN) – The “Reverend” Sun Myung Moon passed away Sunday at the age of 92.
Moon claimed to be the Messiah, and said his existence was a fulfillment of Biblical scripture concerning the return of Jesus. The charismatic leader was incredibly wealthy, having parlayed his follower’s donations into a multi-billion dollar empire, now presumably controlled by his ten children.
Unfortunately, despite his claims of divinity, Rev. Moon’s last words were reportedly, “Hey, is it just me, or is it getting f*cking hot in here?”
“Hey real Jesus, why do I have an apple in my mouth? Jesus?
123321123321
September 3rd, 2012
It should be interesting to see if the “true believers” apostatize now that this false messiah is a corpse?
Dadof3
September 3rd, 2012
Keep a seat warm for Reverends Al and Jesse.
Bob M.
September 3rd, 2012
BWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA!
F.D.R. in Hell
September 3rd, 2012
I heard Lucifer make a comment about a “Full Moon” yesterday and was a bit puzzled…
then I spotted a bloated, maggot-filled corpse of Sun Moon knocking at the Gates.
Cheeseandcrackers, that Baptist fool Harry Truman thought the Korean Culture and Freedom Foundation was legit. What a moron.
jwm
September 3rd, 2012
At least he gets to meet mohammed.
JWM
CrustyB
September 3rd, 2012
This is the guy Neil Armstrong walked on, right?
gorgo
September 3rd, 2012
“As we said before, so say I now again, If any man preach any other gospel unto you than that you have received, let him be accursed.” Galatians 1:9
The Greek word translated “accursed” is anathema, which in this context means “damned by God Himself.”
Given that the Gospel preached by Paul and his associates was very specific and exclusive in its claims, just think of how many other well-known “Christian” figures are bound for the Lake of Fire, too. It ain’t just Moon going to be cast in.
gorgo
September 3rd, 2012
“It should be interesting to see if the ‘true believers’ apostatize now that this false messiah is a corpse?”
Won’t happen, at least not for most of them. Moon was incapacitated for some time so there’s no doubt long been a lie ready-made for this event…probably something saying he’s been assumed bodily up to God and/or that the media reports of his death are a lie. Those who are predisposed to believe the lie, will.
Katechon
September 3rd, 2012
That Canadian tattooed expatriated preacher should have kicked that Myung Moon into the LORD’S submission.
Now it’s too late. Eternal damnation! Oh well.
BigSlurpy
September 3rd, 2012
The Branch Paulunicans are in a mad rush to indoctrinate these very gullible people.
super toe
September 3rd, 2012
In other news, half moon cookies are on sale at my local bakery.
cakes
September 3rd, 2012
Karma dictates this guy’s eternal punishment : wandering the world’s airports bald, wrapped in a sheet, barefoot and begging for money and beating a drum forever and ever and ever…
Clyde
September 3rd, 2012
Is this the guy who invented Moon Pie?
Roscoe P. Soultrane
September 3rd, 2012
If he’s claiming to be Jesus returned, and he died on Sunday, you guys have to give him the same three days Jesus got last time he snuffed it. A 72-hour rule, as it were. Basically, it’s an open question until the end of Tuesday.
Roscoe P. Soultrane
September 3rd, 2012
@CrustyB: “This is the guy Neil Armstrong walked on, right?”
Nope, that was Charles Mann and Warren Moon – Mann walks on Moon.
spymyeyes
September 4th, 2012
Nobody ever said what happens to jesus “AFTER” his return.
How long is his return for?
How will he be recalled to heaven a second time?
Who says he will return to heaven at all?
Once he defeats satan and the thousand years of peace begins does he stick around and rule for a thousand years?
The end of the bible is so incomplete that shills like “moon” can script anything they want and as long as they have a magnetic personality, sheeple will ALWAYS follow.
Tim
September 4th, 2012
One thing is for sure – he won’t be lonely.
Joe
September 4th, 2012
Somebody called a sale at Penney’s.