Coley Oneal Mitchell, a lab animal services technician at Georgia Health Services University was found drunk in a locker room with two loose monkeys Monday night.
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Lab Tech Arrested After Being Found Drunk, Partially Nude With Chimps
AUGUSTA, GA (KTLA) — A 32-year-old man was arrested after after he was found cavorting with a pair of monkeys in a college locker room.
Officials also say he was partially nude.
h/t Chalupa
Diann
August 21st, 2012
“Beneath the Planet of the Apes 2″
ed
August 21st, 2012
‘No word on whether Mitchell gets to keep his job.’
Really? That’s even an option?
Will Profit
August 21st, 2012
Oh c’mon, who hasn’t drunkenly peeled off their clothes and spanked the monkey while romping through the research lab?
Poonces
August 21st, 2012
“Chimp diddler” ought to make him a shoe in if he ever decides to run for office as a democrat.
Xavier
August 21st, 2012
This is what Dharma meant by “Red Hot Monkey Love”.
Anonymous
August 21st, 2012
Mitchell was reported saying, “That was the best night of my life.”
RANDO
August 21st, 2012
I hope he knows this will go on his permanent record.
Maudie N Mandeville
August 21st, 2012
Quick, Someone get Fluke’s morning after pills for the chimps.
RANDO
August 21st, 2012
Drunk and naked with chimps is no way to go through life…
Hybrid Lemon
August 21st, 2012
AKA Jerry Simiandusky
BILL
August 21st, 2012
Do you think he was wondering what sex with the first wookie was like and this is a close as he could come to replicating it?
GM Car Of The Future
August 21st, 2012
UPDATE:
When interviewed by police, Mitchell said, “Sure I was drunk. Didn’t you see those ugly co-eds?”
Chalupa
August 21st, 2012
More fun than a barrel of beer with monkeys.
Chalupa
August 21st, 2012
@Diann – Planet Of The Apes meets The Hangover.
WiscoDave
August 21st, 2012
“But, but I sent my $5 to the DNC for dinner with the Obama’s…?”
MNHawk
August 21st, 2012
And they called it monkey love
Oh, I guess they’ll never know…
Stranded in Sonoma
August 21st, 2012
He was just registering them as democrats for the November vote. Plus a little sugar on the side…
even steven
August 21st, 2012
“I done got me a date with Miss Siberia!”– Coley Oneal Mitchell
http://www.lancelotlinksecretchimp.com/Gallery/miss_siberia_m.jpg
Chalupa
August 21st, 2012
Looks like he’s staring at the sheriff’s pant bulge.
Sarge
August 21st, 2012
Celebrating Augusta National going Co-Ed.
Billy Fuster
August 21st, 2012
How can one be “partially nude”?
davey b
August 21st, 2012
1.) h/t Chalupa — FIGURES [BWAhahahaha]
2.) AUGUSTA, GA — DUHH
Bob M.
August 21st, 2012
Better check the females in a few – say, how long IS the gestation of chimps, anyways – well, maybe years – to see if any of the offspring are blonde and dopey-looking!
Chuck U Farley
August 21st, 2012
Dennis Leary is now a Lab Technician? Who knew?
Frosteetoes
August 21st, 2012
Holy shit, go to the link and see all these related bestiality stories. WTF is wrong with our society?
Chalupa
August 21st, 2012
A hat tip is worth, at best, a buck and a half
IronyCurtain
August 21st, 2012
PUT YOUR STINKING PAWS ON ME, YOU DELICIOUSLY DIRTY APE!!!