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This Just In – A New Kickstarter Type Site For Porn
I am posting this without perusing the site.
I looked at the front page. There are no porn pics or anything of that nature. It’s all text. But this has got to be comedy gold. I’ll be back in a half hour.
Update: Half Hour Shmalf Hour. I’m back in ten minutes. Right on the front page. A gay project aimed at Mitt Romney.
GOT MORMON MILK?
Suits, power, and a clean cut secret society
The Mormonboyz site is relaunching this September, featuring hot young Mormon missionaries and their higher ranking priesthood leaders–business-like, suit-wearing, men of the Videntium Oraculi. Except this time, Mormonboyz will kickstart things with the creation of a porn film, Got Mormon Milk?
Got Mormon Milk?
The film, and subsequently the website, will chronicle how I inadvertently unveiled the (very sexual) rituals that are performed as a rite of passage into this secret society–A secret society that I suspect has definitely touched Mitt Romney, given his LDS clout and political status. As the best way I can think of to kick off the relaunch of the Mormonboyz website, I will enter the documentary Got Mormon Milk? into the HUMP! amateur porn festival this fall. Given the upcoming 2012 presidential election, the timing just seems right!
When complete and if accepted to HUMP!, the 6 scene porn documentary Got Mormon Milk? will provide the perfect antidote for those wanting relief from Obama v. Romney 2012. Indeed, Mitt will have just spent hundreds of millions of dollars in an effort to convince the public that his ass–clad in magic underpants–should be firmly planted on the seat of power. So it seems prudent that Americans take a long, hard, uncut look under the hood, to really grapple with the gravity of these magic Mormon underwear!
!snip!
I have to keep browsing. This is like RegrEtsy, only more deranged.
Here’s one where the guy wants to make a porn site and he has absolutely NOTHING. You are basically funding him so he can surround himself with naked women.
BUDGET: Start up costs and 1st years’ production:
Filming location & office:
Deposits 3.750 USD
Filming location rent 11.250 USD
Furnitures 1.800 USD
Decoration 600 USD
Cameras 5.500 USD
Lighting 250 USD
Sound 250 USD
Software 300 USD
Other 1.000 USD
Personnel:
Production Manager (myself) 0 USD
Location Manager 30.000 USD
Licker girl 1 30.000 USD
Licker girl 2 30.000 USD
Licker girl 3 30.000 USD
The first 30 models 150.000 USD
Website
Domain & hosting 130 USD
Graphic design 1.250 USD
CMS 3.500 USD
Programming 8.700 USD
Streaming 100 USD
Webshop
Vibrators 12.500 USD
Shipment boxes 250 USD
Warehouse 0 USD
Company startup
VAT registration 200 USD
Accounting 1.950 USD
Lawyer 9.500 USD
Funding
Offbeatr fee, 20% 70.720 USD
Streaming costs, donors 8.000 USD
Gifts, donors 6.500 USD
Shipment costs, gifts 6.000 USD
= Total costs 424.000 USD
After the launch, the production of content should be able to move on with own and/or external production funded by membership fees.
If you find this project interesting, your donation would be highly appreciated! And of course, please feel free to ask any question you might have. Thank you very much.
Best regards
Martin
!snip!
That’s an awful lot of vibrators. And why does the graphic designer get crapola?
Bad Brad
August 17th, 2012
Yeah whatever. There’s a guy on their named Furry artist. Don’t act like he’s not a relative.
Rightwingfeather
August 17th, 2012
Just a half hour?
MaryfromMarin
August 17th, 2012
Your tax dollars at work.
Rightwingfeather
August 17th, 2012
Just 10 minutes?
melthemean
August 17th, 2012
In every town, in every street,
In nearly every house you meet
A little imp, who wriggles in,
With half a sneer and half a grin,
And climbs upon your rocking chair
Or creeps upon you anywhere;
And when he gets you very near,
Just whispers something in your ear,
Some rumor or another’s shame,
And little ‘Hearsay’ is his name.
He never really claims to know;
He’s only heard that it is so;
And then he whispers it to you,
So you will go and whisper too.
For if enough is passed along,
The rumor even though it’s wrong,
If John tells Henry; Henry, Flo;
And Flo tells Mildred, and Mildred, Ruth;
It very soon will pass for truth.
You understand this little elf;
He doesn’t say he knows himself;
He only whispers it to you
Because he knows you’ll go and tell
Some other whisperers as well;
And so before the setting sun
He gets the devil’s mischief done,
And there is less of joy and good,
Around your little neighborhood.
Look out for ‘Hearsay’ when he sneaks
Inside the house when Slander speaks,
Just ask the proof in every case;
Just ask the name, the date, the place;
And if he says he only heard,
Declare you don’t believe a word
And tell him that you’ll not repeat
The silly chatter of the street,
However gossips smile and smirk,
Refuse to do the devil’s work!
I have lost all respect for you, BFH
cfm990
August 17th, 2012
It’s a dirty job…
RosalindJ
August 17th, 2012
“This is like RegrEtsy, only more deranged.”
All I need to know..
Xavier
August 17th, 2012
What is this I don’t even
Xavier
August 17th, 2012
Now I see why people say, “Furry? Burn it with fire”.
Chuck U Farley
August 17th, 2012
Every ‘secret society’ throughout history has been said to have homosexual rituals.
One of the accusations against the Templars was rampant Barry O Man Country antics. Nothing new.
One would think the libstains would love an organization that had rampant Man-love.
So Mitt’s doing the ‘down low’? Doesn’t that make him just like their progtard idol, The Won?
Bad Brad
August 17th, 2012
Xavier:”What is this I don’t even”
That sound like the old, Don’t Stop routine. You know, like don’t stop. Or Don’t, Stop. We are only men. You confuse us.
Xavier
August 17th, 2012
@Bad Brad
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=What%20is%20this%20i%20don%27t%20even
#3
Mary Jane Anklestraps
August 17th, 2012
LOLOLOL!!!!!
OMgah! People have no shame.
He should just pay the lawyer to screw him.
Mary Jane Anklestraps
August 17th, 2012
“I have lost all respect for you, BFH”
Joke’s on you, he never had any. lolol
[I know, I know, double triple secret probation]
BigFurHat
August 17th, 2012
LOST respect for me?
I think the fundamental problem was having respect for me in the first place.
But regarding this post, somebody has to make fun of these noodniks. Silence only tells others that it’s tolerated.
I think that has been the flaw with the people who want to preserve morality. They are unwilling to get ankle deep in the muck, choosing to ignore it and let it grow in the darkness, confusing awareness and confrontation with participating.
This is why we’ll lose – too many fainting couches and hand fans.
BigFurHat
August 17th, 2012
I was a second too late MJA.
Maudie N Mandeville
August 17th, 2012
Like no pictures of an abortion?
Maudie N Mandeville
August 17th, 2012
Better yet, no pictures of a homosexual withdrawal?
Bad Brad
August 17th, 2012
Xavier. I think we are right back to the don’t stop.
Moxie Man
August 17th, 2012
Whew, just returned from a 30 minute webinar on Japanese porn. How do I explain my carpal tunnel syndrome to my wife?
Maudie N Mandeville
August 17th, 2012
I understand melthemean. Shouldn’t be any link to porn, but Moxie evidently found one.
even steven
August 17th, 2012
No scriptwriter?
Boobie the Racist Dog
August 18th, 2012
$70,725 for “Offbeatr fee?” Damn expensive handjob, unless it’s a year’s subscription.
spymyeyes
August 18th, 2012
your link to “offbeatr.com does not work.
everytime I try it windows error message sayz page not available.
methinks “mitt” haz launched a “denial of service attack already”!
Brooke
August 18th, 2012
Gah. Sorry, didn’t look…
…But call me when these doofs get the stones to make a ‘Got Mohammad Milk’ project.