I’m sure you saw Michelle Obama’s appearance on David Letterman’s show. After all, it’s mandatory under Obamacare.
However, if you’re now a felon fleeing justice, I’ll recap a few of the highlights so you can squeak by with “reasonable doubt” during your trial:
* Her admission that she and Oprah are actually the same person.
* That whole “being carried onto the stage by shirtless Secret Service agents” thing.
* When she snuck out halfway through the interview because of an uncontrollable urge to shop at Target.
* Those clips of her in the Green Room, throttling interns while screaming “where the f@#$ are my tamales?”